Review - R.I.P.D.

At the Theater - "R.I.P.D." - Yes, it's a ripoff of the MIB movies and an ungodly awful one at that.  The creature designs regarding the "Deados" (I'm not making this shit up, that's what they're referred to in the film) are laughably uninspired (just plain LAZY) and wholly cartoonish- the effects work regarding the monstrous spirits is even worse.  Ryan Reynolds (Safe House) seems embarrassed throughout the film's run-time while Jeff Bridges (The Big Lebowski) decides to make the most of a golden opportunity to ham it up- the only thing positive about this film is his scenery-chewing presence and several funny zingers he utters with a western twang. Overall, this $130 million misfire should have debuted on the SyFy channel instead of hitting theaters...

Ryan Reynolds stars as "Nick Walker", a Bostonian Detective who's killed in the line of duty and subsequently drafted into the service of the Rest In Peace Department, an agency of slain police officers who patrol the afterlife for undead spirits.  Walker is partnered up with wild west lawman, "Roy Pulsipher", an 1800's era U.S. Marshall played by Jeff Bridges- there's very little chemistry between the pair to speak of, though I can't recollect any kind of effort from the narrative.  The duo appear amongst the living via human avatars, with character actor James Hong representing Reynolds and Sports Illustrated Swimsuit/Victoria's Secret Model, Marissa Miller representing Bridges. The alternate identities gimmick, much like the entire film, isn't allowed to breathe with such a flippant script and formulaic Direction- I'm not so sure the premise could have separated itself from the Men In Black similarities and comparisons, but this could have gleefully wallowed around in guilty pleasure territory had it not been so painfully undercooked.

I'm indifferent towards Reynolds as an Actor/film presence, though I can't blame him here- he's just not given anything to work with.  I am a big fan of Jeff Bridges and must admit to laughing out loud more than a few times at some of his characters' zany one-liners and snippets of dialogue- Bridges is one of Hollywood's finest Actors, though he never stood a chance with what he's surrounded with here.  Hopefully, 2014's Seventh Son finds Bridges in better company.  If not, the Oscar-winner might want to slow down and become a bit more selective regarding his projects...

Kevin Bacon (Footloose) is once again thrust into a villainous role as the corrupt cop who harbors a predictable secret.  The FX work regarding the true nature of his identity is by far the sharpest in the film, though it bares little weight.

Mary-Louise Parker (Showtime's Weeds) plays the Director of the supernatural agency, with her character having some kind of history with Pulsipher that's, of course, never really fleshed out. A late scene where she gnaws on the Western lawman's goatee is the kind of wild, left-field antic that the film desperately needed more of.

French actress Stephanie Szostak (Iron Man 3) plays Walker's love interest- she's a cutie who's wasted in a paper-thin, obligatory role.  Have you ever stopped to consider just how many flicks in Reynolds's filmography have featured scenes where his respective character was introduced with a scantily clad female in his bedroom?  Could it be some kind of narcissistic stipulation in his contract?

Devin Ratray (Home Alone), Robert Knepper (Wild Thing) and Mike O'Malley (CBS's Yes, Dear) pop up briefly as potential Deado suspects, while actor/comedian Larry Joe Campbell (ABC's According To Jim) makes a bare-bellied appearance as a Police Officer.

Funny thing, the Director of this film, Robert Schwentke, helmed 2010's RED- the sequel of which, RED 2, (Directed by Dean Parisot) arrived in theaters on the same day/weekend.  I'm thinking Schwentke would have been better off staying with the franchise he was familiar with, while Parisot (Galaxy Quest) may have been the better suited to have dealt with R.I.P.D.'s material and tone ...then again, maybe not.  I challenge anyone to search the net and find a quality Deado image lifted from the film- trust me, they're just not out there at his point and with good reason (the creature with several eyes in the trailer is not in the film).  A sequence featuring an entirely CGI-rendered obese man/demon running amok, complete with whale tale (the high-riding panties, that is), won't soon be forgotten.  Halfway through this particular segment of craptasticness, I realized my eyes had glazed over and my jaw had dropped...

I'm aware of but unfamiliar with the Dark Horse Comic from which this film is adapted- that said, I'm positive that an interested party would find more gratifying entertainment value and a far superior experience within it's pages.  There just HAS to be better quality material involved with the comics line to have furnished enough inspiration for a film adaptation. 

As is, R.I.P.D. is an ill-conceived and poorly executed mess- it's the worst theatrically released comic book film of 2013 and, in all likelihood, won't be surpassed as such. Skip it entirely. Universal Studios, you're better than this.


4.0 out of 10